Taking Chances

Work this Fall has been crazy and busy. I've drove school buses more than I've wanted, but what was necessary. In the midst of the craziness I survived, dog/house sat, visited Hawaii and did a couple of things I probably wouldn't have done in previous years and especially at a younger age.

I've come to a conclusion that I have to be me in all that I do and if a guy doesn't respond to what I do then it's not meant to be. What have I got to loose? Nothing. I suffer through the long painful process of wondering if a guy likes me and when it comes to my realization that they don't it's too late and I've invested to much of myself and the guy has invested nothing.

I became good friends with Spring/Summer guy after he apologized for last summer. In the 2 months that followed we talked a lot and I thought we were just friends. But I started realizing that I couldn't wait to see him each week and when he brought another girl with him to my house, it hit me how attached I was. Not sure why I do that, but it's obviously my personality. So the first of September I decided to let him know I had feelings for him. It went well, and we talked about it. I expected him to avoid it and and avoid me. That didn't happen we talked about it more than I thought we would and he asked to remain friends and to not have me avoid him if possible. At least I know where I stand and where I go from here. If I need to pull away to let my more than friends feelings for him end, then that's what I do. I'll let you know how it goes.

Then I met a guy at a party and had a really good time talking to him and getting to know him. He is a friend of a friend of mine. So when you don't have a direct connection of your own with someone it's harder to see them and get to know them. I had hopes of seeing him at a birthday party a couple weeks later but he didn't come. I asked our mutual friend what I should do and she didn't know. So I did something about it. I found him on facebook and sent him a message. It was simple, I hoped he remembered me, asked if we could get to know each other, and said that there was no expectations or pressure. That was last Monday 11/22/10 and he hasn't responded...Upside is that his not responding is probably because he is not interested, so I save myself from investing time and energy in him.

I just have to keep getting out and going places to meet new people and experiencing life!